1. What I was doing 7 years ago this morning. I was home sick from work. The phone woke me up. I was laying in bed and could hear my mom on the phone downstairs. She sounded distressed. I distinctly heard "Oh no." Of course this freaked me out thinking something must have happened to someone in the family. I went down to see what was going on. When she saw me she said "We're being attacked." or something along those lines. The tv was on. I imagined a huge missile of some kind heading straight for our house. Then I saw what was really going on. We both sat and watched as the second plane went into the towers and as the information about the planes at the Pentagon and in Pennsylvania was discovered. I felt in shock all day.
I was freaking out when they started setting up the triage at the bottom of the towers. I kept telling my mom "they're going to fall down.... they're going to fall down.. why are they staying near them." I guess no one else thought that was going to happen. I remember watching people jump. I remember watching the towers fall and people running. I will never forget those images or that day.
2. I remember that night watching as we attacked- our first strike I guess. I was so worried about it. I kept thinking, "What if they have nothing to do with it." I felt like we didn't know enough yet. But, obviously I don't know what they knew so I can't really say for sure.
3. I think about the way everyone seemed different right after. I would go to the grocery store and everyone was being friendly and actually looking at you. It seemed to bring us all together. I don't even remember when that changed. I don't remember the moment when people stopped acting that way. I think that is one of the reasons people say "never forget". It's hard to keep that feeling of how fragile life is, how special every person is with you in every day life.
4. I think about how many movies and tv shows take place in New York City and there is always that twin towers shot. It is still wierd to see that.
5. I remember feeling like I never wanted to fly again. I'm not a huge fan of flying anyway. It gave me one more thing to worry about.
6. I think about the day that my dad, mom, and I went to New York City one year later. We went to Ground Zero. I will never forget what it felt like to stand there next to the chain link fence littered with little flags and flowers and look at the massive hole that was once those landmarks. It was so much bigger than I had imagined. It was surreal to be there. There were construction vehicles cleaning up and moving things around still. It was only a week before the anniversary that we were there.
7. I think about looking toward Ground Zero from the top of the Empire State builiding and seeing the ginormous flag on the building behind it. It looked like it had got some exterior damage as well. It had become kind of a landmark in itself. You saw that flag and you knew where the towers had been.
8. I think about the guy on the water taxi. After our day in New York City we rode a water taxi back over to the parking lot in New Jersey. There was a man on with us that worked in the city. We were talking with him and he mentioned that he had worked near the towers. He had been there that day. He had experienced the running, the smoke, the chaos. He said he had thought he was going to die. After he talked about it he seemed a little haunted. I have a picture of my parents a little bit after that and he is in the background sitting hunched over looking very serious. I wondered if he was thinking about it. I hoped that he didn't regret talking to us about it. Yet, maybe it helped him to talk to someone that wasn't there.
9. I think about going to Arlington cemetary on that same trip. From the cemetary we could see the Pentagon. We could see the large gaping hole. Seeing all of these things made it so real.
10. I think about a few days later while we were on Prince Edward Island weathering a small hurricane in a little cabin watching the news and that even though we were in Canada it was a special for the anniversary of 9-11 and had stories of the people involved and affected. It was really moving to watch it after having just been there.
11. I think about the movie I watched a few months ago about the flight that went down in Pennsylvania. It was so hard to watch. I had no idea. I mean, I had known as much as anybody else, I guess, about what had gone on in the plane but I never really thought about how terrifying it would have been on those planes. It just made me more aware of how brave and amazing those people aboard the planes were. After the movie I watched the special features where it showed each actor and talked about the person they had played.... it gave some back story and showed the actors meeting the family members of the people they portrayed. They had done such a good job casting that some of the families felt like their loved one was with them. Most of the actors were crying. It was so touching. I also admired the fact that they got the permission of the families first before making this movie. They waited until all of them were ready for it and then were able to find out all of the phone conversations, etc from the people that knew exactly how they had happened. It isn't a movie to watch with soda and popcorn for entertainment, but it is good and powerful show and I think it is nice to remember the individuals instead of just the event.
12. I think about how much the world has changed since then. It is so weird that my daughter will never know what it was like to walk someone to their gate before their flight or meet them afterward at the gate. She won't know a time when she didn't have to line up with trays for her bags and take off her shoes. She won't remember the time when people came together over something-united as a country- even if for only a moment. She'll just hear all the yelling and fighting and slander thrown back and forth from both sides of every issue. Not that this is a new thing but for some reason it seems like it has gotten a lot worse in the past few years. No matter what I think of President Bush it still really bugs me to have people call him horrible names and talk about him like he is not a person in a public forum. I think everyone is entitled to their opinion and that is what is so great about our country but I always think about what it must be like for that persons wife/ parents/ children and themselves when they can't open a magazine, watch tv, watch an awards show without people saying really cruel things about them.I wonder why, at least in public, people can't be nice about their opinions. I don't know when it became okay to talk about someone the way he gets talked about just because you don't agree with them or because they don't give good speeches. I stopped watching the VMA's online because I was so annoyed about it. I don't know why celebrities think they know everything. I don't know why being famous all of a sudden means you are right and everyone else is dumb and you are supposed to tell everyone this anytime you get the chance.
13. I am thinking about how grateful I am to be an American. It's not that cool or PC to be 'patriotic' anymore but I don't care. It's not PC to say we are the best country in the world anymore. I don't think we are the only great country- I hope to go to Europe someday, I LOVE Canada... but I am so proud to live here. I think we are a great country founded on amazing principles that I wish we could get back to and remember. I think the founding fathers would be apalled at how some people interpret the things they devoted their lives to. I am feeling grateful that I live here. I am feeling grateful that I get to raise my daughter in this country. I am thinking about the sacrifice that those founding fathers went through to give us the freedoms we have, the sacrifice that my ancestors went through as pioneers to further our freedom to worship the way I do, I am thinking of the sacrifice made by all of those who died and helped out on September 11, 2001 and I am feeling grateful that so many people have been willing to make these kinds of sacrifices. (Dad in Vietnam, Brent in the first gulf war, etc) I am hoping we can never forget these things.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
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4 comments:
I've been to NYC many times, and a few times since 9-11. The feeling at Ground Zero is so reverent. We went into the fire station on the south side of Ground Zero, and Adam talked to the firefighters a lot and bought some merchandise from them.
It really did affect me in huge ways, that day.
This was a great post and I enjoyed reading it. I agree with you on pretty much everything you wrote. It's amazing how 9/11 changed our lives so quickly and powerfully.
It's neat that you went to the two sites. I want to go visit the Pentagon now that the new memorial with a bench for each victim was dedicated by President Bush this morning.
I was at Ground Zero a few years ago. The TV coverage doesn't do justice to how it really looks there. One of my friends worked right by there and he had to run down the street that day to escape the debris of the crashing towers. That kind of made it hit home for me. Anyway, thanks for the deep, introspective thoughts.
I don't think any of us will ever forget that day. It's weird, because Dan was on a 9 day elk hunt, and just happened to move to a different area and called me. I told him what was happening, but I don't think he could fully understand without actually witnessing the events as they unfolded. I remember laying in bed that night and not hearing planes going over our house... and how "creepy quiet" that seemed.
I don't know if you remember or not, but the people I worked for in New York worked in the World Trade Center...and I had been there many times. I immediately called them and got their son Dana on the phone. Diane was supposed to be on a plane going to Washington D.C. that morning, and David was stuck at the Atlanta airport. Dana was scared to death. I reassured him the best I could but made him promise to call me when he had talked to his mom and knew she was safe. Most of my New York pictures have the towers in them...and I have a pin that I bought of the New York skyline (very 80's!!!) that I have tucked away. It makes me cry when I look at it. I think the most important thing we can do as parents is to raise our children to understand what a tremendous sacrifice was made that day by so many people, and how many courageous people have since then, and also in the future, will fight to keep us free. I often tell people, "while your dad was going to college mine was in Vietnam... while you were having a normal childhood and graduated with the same people you went to kindergarten with... I was learning a love and appreciation for our country and those who serve her as I watched our dad walk out the door in his uniform or watched his ship sail away for another 6 month cruise that you just can't learn in a classroom. I will never take for granted the freedoms that I have, or that my children have, and even though they are really too young to remember everything about 9/11(Kenna was almost 6, Courtney was almost 1) I will make sure they always appreciate and remember what was lost that day...and that we live in the best country in the world!!!!!
I appreciate all that you said, Cheryl. Thanks!
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